Indications That She Likes You.

By Donnavan Finlay, Co-Founder of Guyding Principals.

“People may not always tell you how they feel about you, but they will always show you. Pay attention”

When I was younger I found myself clueless on this matter. I did get better with time and practice, but my younger cousin asked me for some advise about this recently. This made me realize that I was not the only one and some still struggle with it today. Do we really know when a girl is into you or not? Some people will not be able to tell even if the signs are clear to others.

Non-verbal communication is what we need to look for. Girls are shy as well and will seldom tell you straight up that they are interested in you. She may not say the words but her body language will tell the whole story.

Look out for the following hints to show you the way.

  • She Engages in the Conversation.

When she sticks around talking to you and engages in the conversation, it shows that she is interested in you. A better sign would be if she stays chatting to you after her friends have already left.

  • She Faces You.

When a girl faces you in the conversation it shows that she is interested. Other things to look for are open arms. Crossed arms is not a good sign. If she is turned away from you she is not that interested and possibly has something else on her mind.

  • She Laughs at What You Have to Say.

This is a great sign if she finds you funny. We all know humor is a great icebreaker. If you get to laugh together, you are making a great impression on her. Just don’t overdo it.

  • She Tells You that She is Single.

This indicates that she wants you to know that she is available. If she was not interested she will most likely not mention it or even lie and tell you that she is in a relationship.

  • She Smiles at You.

A girl who smiles at you likes you. It is that simple. If she is shy, she might just smiled momentarily, but she will smile at you.

  • Her Friends will Drop Clues if She Likes You.

She will surely tell her friends if she likes you so note their actions as well. Are they friendly towards you? Does it seem like he friends are teasing her? Have nay of her friends hinted with a question if you may like her?

  • She Compliments You.

When you see her she might give you compliments on being well dressed or other physical appearance.

  • She Hugs You.

This proves that she has no concerns with physically engaging with you. She may be a bit shy to tell you in words that she likes you but a hug may be her way of telling you.

  • She Gets a Bit Jealous.

If she shows that she gets a bit annoyed when you talk to other girls it shows that she is interested. No one likes competition. Just note that you should not play with her feelings. No decent self-respecting girl likes a player. If she goes all hardcore jealous I suggest you move with caution.


Some people find it tough to express how they feel, but the body language will always tell the truth. Take note of her non-verbal communication and you will get the message.


Once she has given you the signals you should return the favor. Return the smile and return the compliments. This will put her at ease and both of you can relax knowing you like one another.


If you have more questions please feel free to contact us.


Good luck out there!






Making That First Impression.

“Two things are irretrievable, time and first impressions”

By Donnavan Finlay, Co-Founder of Guyding Principals.

Over the past month I have been travelling all over our planet again for personal and business reasons. Although I hoped I would have some off time, it turned into endless meetings, networking events and dinner parties, one after the other. I ended up having the privilege to meet many great people from different countries and backgrounds. It all turned out great thinking back.

At the events I was meeting these new acquaintances, both personal and professional, I started to realize how some people’s body language changed the tone of the conversation and ultimately the outcome of the discussion. Taking note of how people were addressing one another and how they presented themselves through non-verbal communication, aka body language.

I noted how some people just got it all wronged watching in agony as they suffered through one conversation after the other and that is why I decided to touch on this subject again.

When we meet someone for the first time we pass judgment on that person in only a few of seconds. We would all like to think that we are not that superficial and do not judge a book by it’s cover, but we would just be lying to ourselves. Think of meeting two people. One person is well dressed and intently listening to what you have to say and engages as part of the conversation. The other person is untidy, looking around all the time and checking his phone every 30 seconds without it making a sound. This all while you are talking and trying to make your point. Which one of the two do you think you would like to keep the conversation ongoing? My guess would be the person that is intently listening and engaging in the conversation. Why would you want to spend time with a person who is obviously not listening and would rather like to be somewhere else?

This is why you need to practice good body language at all times. With time it will come more naturally and you will be able to carry across your points and visions for others to see without misunderstandings. Not just verbally, but non-verbally as well. Good body language can set you up for a successful evening, dating or professional. Poor body language will have the opposite effect.

This is the same for your professional and personal life. Every time you go out and would like to meet someone, you should focus on your body language. Giving a positive first impression will put in a good position to have a good night. On the other side, when you make a negative first impression, you have a tough disadvantage and will most likely end up creating a bad reputation for yourself.

At the end of the day, body language is a pivotal form of non-verbal communication.

Here are some tips to focus on and make that positive first impression.

  • Eye contact

When you are having a conversation with someone you should make and maintain good eye contact. No need to stare the person down, just keep eye contact to show that you are listening and interested. How would you feel if you are in a conversation with a person and they keep looking away at the TV in the corner of the room? You will feel that the person is not interested in what you have to say and you are wasting their time, right? This will end a first date early, guaranteed.

  • Posture

Keep yourself relaxed, whether you are sitting or standing. Keep your back straight but not too stiff. Relax your shoulders and hands. This will state that you are comfortable with your surroundings and help the other person feel relaxed as well. If you sit up too straight and fidget with your hands, it will let the other person feel that you would rather want to be somewhere else.

  • Lean in

When you are in a conversation with another person, you should lean in slightly towards that person. This will affirm that you are interested in what they have to say. When you do the opposite by leaning away it will tell the person that you are not interested in what they have to say, or make them think that they might smell funny.

  • Arms

Always try to avoid crossing you arms in any conversation. When you do, you are sending the message that you don’t like what is going on around you. It shows you are closed to the conversation and hostile to the environment. Practice on letting your arms hang by your side or bring your hands together on your lap. This sends the signal that you are open to the conversation. This goes for sitting and standing.

  • Affirming movements

Smiling and nodding your head shows that you are listening to the conversation and will show you have empathy with the person. When dealing with a difficult person this is an important attribute. People in general just want to be heard. When smiling and nodding, (and not interrupting) you will make them feel that you are listening to them and that you understand their plight.

  • The Handshake

This is a key non-verbal communication point. In some circles this can make or break your reputation and can even show disrespect to the other person. Make sure you have a firm grip, but not crush the other person’s hand. Combined with good eye contact, this will set a good tone for the meeting or conversation. A weak grip and avoiding eye contact will make you look weak and fragile. Not a good way to start a conversation. Especially a first date or job interview.

  • Slow down

Take a deep breath and relax. Slow down your talking and movements. This will show that you are confident and thoughtful. It will have a relaxing effect on you and the other people in the conversation.

Now you have some pointers on what you should work on to make that good first impression. Doing this will help you start a conversation on a positive note and people will listen to what you have to say. Important to remember is that this needs to be practiced in all areas of your life. Whether you meet new colleagues at work, networking events, new boss or just going on a first date. First impression is a lasting impression.

  • Not to do

Now for the NOT TO DO list. These are some notes I made while travelling and seeing people actually make these mistakes. I cringed at some of them and did not know how people can be so ignorant to their own behavior. Then I realized that it is something that needs to be practiced. It takes time. I had to learn like everyone else. This at the end of the day is why we started this venture of Guyding Principals.

  • Fake Smiling

People can pick this up very easily, so ne need to even bother. This will just annoy people and make them dislike you. Think of the times you have had to go to a store and was greeted by someone with that fake smile. You picked it up easily and so can other people. Avoid at all costs.

  • Checking the time

I have no real idea why someone would think this is okay. Checking your time while in a conversation tells the other person that you are not interested and already thinking of what you need to do later. You might be in a hurry but at least tell the person that you have limited time if you have to. Then when you tell the person that you have to go, it will not be so bad.

  • Tapping

Avoid tapping your fingers or feet. This tells the person that you are in a hurry to get this conversation done.

  • Interrupting people

When you are in a conversation, listen. Truly listen. Avoid thinking of your response and rather focus on what the person is saying. Do not interrupt this person. When they are done talking, then you can ask questions. This will tell the person that you were actually listening. They will respect that.

  • Avoid distractions.

Avoid looking at the TV when you are in a conversation. Keep eye contact and avoid looking around the room. I know a TV can be distracting, but you can always look up the football scores at a later time. If you do this on a first date you will show the other person that you are more interested in the sport scores and you will be going home alone. This goes for checking your phone all the time as well.

There you have it. Focus on the things I suggested and you will notice that you get a more positive responses from people. This is all from experience and I have had to work on them to improve my own body language, and I still do. Body language is controlled by our subconscious but that does not mean that we cannot work on it to improve it. Studies have shown that most communication is nonverbal. Up to 90%. The first impression will be a lasting one, so make sure it is a good one.

What have you noticed other people do that annoys you and tells you that they are not interested in what you have to say?


Dealing with Shyness.

“Believe in your Flyness. Conquer your Shyness” – Kanye West

By Donnavan Finlay, Co-Founder of Guyding Principals.

I posted an article about dealing with shyness at networking events and it got some good feedback. I did realize that this is not the only area some people need help with their social anxiety. It is estimated that about 17 million Americans have to deal with social anxiety or a social phobia on a regular basis. This is not an issue only adults have to deal with. Kids do as well. When kids join a new school they have to try to make new friends. I remember the times I moved schools. The one thing I hated was anxiety I felt, as I knew I had to try to make new acquaintance. I found it pretty stressful.

From my experiences and with dealing with shy people at a variety of events, I have put together some ideas of what you can work on to deal with your anxiety.

  • Act with Confidence.

This is one thing that you will have to work on continuously. Only through action, learning and practice will you get the results you want.

As with most things in life you need to practice continuously and learn as you go along. Think of playing golf. You need to put in a lot of practice to get better results. And even when you do get better, you still need to work on it to keep that performance level. If you do take some time off from playing, next time you do play you will have poor results and you have to almost start all over again.

Practice makes perfect.

  • Participate in YOUR LIFE

Life is too short to worry about being rejected. And to be fair, who really cares. So next time you are at the gym, start some small talk with someone.

Sporting events are great places to start a random conversation. You already have something in common, you like sports. It is easy from there.

If you see someone you are romantically attracted to, start a conversation. Ask them on a date if you feel the timing is right. Worst-case scenario, they say no. Nothing has changed and life goes as normal.

Most important lesson here is to engage and participate in your own life.

  • Just Say, “YES”

Step out of your comfort zone and try something new that makes you a bit anxious. I usually suggest to people to join some sort of club. Whether it is a sports club or social club. Put yourself in a position where you can meet new people. This will help you gain confidence and your anxiety of meeting new people will fade over time.

Another great option is to take on a new task. Something that will challenge you. Get a new hobby or develop a new skill.

Challenge yourself at every opportunity you get.

  • Be More Talkative

Whenever an opportunity comes up where you can do a speech or presentation, take it. This will be scary at first, but this is a great way to gain confidence. It will take some practice but so does everything worth doing.

Forget what other people may be saying or thinking. This is not about them, this is all about you.

Participate in conversations and make you ideas heard.

Remember that not everyone is going to like you. And it is simply impossible to keep everyone happy. So no need to even try.

  • Take Note of your Body Language

Confident body language is very important. Stand up straight, make eye contact, shake hands and listen. When you do speak, speak clearly and take note of your language.

  • Be Aware

You need to be present in your own life. Be aware of your thoughts and where they lead. You need to keep a positive mind to achieve better things. You can’t live a positive life with a negative mind.

When you try new things and conversations, take note of the whole experience. Learn from it and work on it. Experience your own life. Take note of the things around you that you are grateful for. There are lots of positives all around us. No need to dwell on the past and bad experiences and memories. Life is happening now.


Follow these steps and keep working at it. At the end it is only you that can make the positive changes in your life that you desire.

This is not a quick fix and will not always be easy. But the juice will be worth the squeeze.


Suggested book to read ; How to win friends and influence people by Dale Carnegie. 

Tell us what you do to overcome anxiety.







10 Habits of Likable People.

“Spend more time smiling than frowning and more time praising than criticising” – Richard Branson

By Donnavan Finlay, Co-Founder of Guyding Principals.


In my younger years I always thought that the popular and liked people were just born with the trait. They always had people listen to them and were always surrounded by friends. They were the popular kids and always got what they wanted. They made everything look so easy. I was jealous and I felt I was born without that talent. I was always the in-between kid trying to get people to listen and like me. I was never the popular kid due to my incorrect understanding of how this worked. And by trying to get people to like me I made myself look like an idiot at times.

Now that I am older I have found that you can learn a few of the traits that will improve your situation and become the person people are drawn to. If you follow these basic but fundamental steps you will be able to achieve what you set out to do. People will be willing to help you achieve your goals. You will attract the people to you that will have positive influence in your life.

Listed are the ten basic habits of likeable people.

  1. They are grateful.

Waking up in the morning and being grateful for what you have will set the tone for the rest of the day. You may not have what you dream of yet, but you should be grateful that you are on your way. You should be grateful that you have friends and family that care about you. You should be grateful that you have a place to live. Many people are not that fortunate. Be grateful for the small things that you have. Many people are not that lucky to have what you have. No matter how little you have, there is always someone with less. Be grateful for what you have and not sad about what you do not have.

Train this into your daily routine and it will become a habit. When you wake up in the morning, think of all the things you are grateful for. Some people like to write it down, others just like to think about it. It is up to you. This will put you in a positive mood for the rest of the day. A positive mind will lead to a positive life.

  1. They Listen.

As human beings we believe that it is all about us. Listen for this when people talk to you. It is usually all about them and what they did or want to do. It is just human nature I suppose. It is just the way we are wired.

When we are in a conversation we tend to listen less to what the person is saying and focus more on what our response will be. This is not really listening. Once again we can see that we are trying to make the conversation about us.

Next time you are in a conversation, try to focus on what the person is actually saying. Focus on nothing else. This will take some practice. Then when they do stop, ask questions. It will show the other person that you are truly listening. It is a good sign of trust. People will feel comfortable talking to you and you will be in a position to make some great friends. This will separate you from most other people. And we all know how important it is to stand out from the crowd. You will gain a lot of appreciation and respect.

  1. They are not fake.

Being genuine is a key factor to being liked and respected. Nobody likes a fake. Being fake will make you look untrustworthy and sometimes just silly.

Think of when people buy stuff. When you see fake items, no one goes “OMG, look how lovely this looks. Just look at the quality”. This response is only when people look at genuine stuff. We see genuine products as quality products. We think better quality is less likely to disappoint. Same with people.

Humans are drawn to genuine people as they feel that they are trustworthy. Nobody will like a person that they do not know how they really feel.

You need to be comfortable and confident with whom you are. You should focus on what you want and what drives you. People will be drawn to your focus and dedication. Nobody will be drawn to you if you just make choices that will keep other people happy.

  1. They don’t seek attention.

There is no need to try to be this big personality to draw attention onto yourself. People will see straight through it and will push away from you. I find people like that really annoying. Some may seem impressed, but only for a while.

Think of a person in your group that always seeks attention. Think of someone you were at school at that always tried to get all the attention. Really think about it. Do you or did you like them? I sure didn’t.

Being yourself, and speaking in a calm tone is just fine. Being friendly and considerate is all you need to win people over. When you speak in a friendly and confident manner you will notice that people are more attentive to what you are saying.

Think of good leaders in the world. On occasion when they are recognized for some achievements, they tend to shift the focus to the people who helped them get there. This is a genuine gesture and the people will feel appreciated. Appreciative and humble, two adjectives that are linked to likeability.

  1. They are Consistent.

At a previous job there was this one person that was always all over the place. You could never judge what response you were going to get from the person. Mood swings were up and down as the day went on. It was a very uncomfortable situation to be in. It affected the person’s reputation and the office atmosphere. Nobody liked working with that person. It was such a shame because he was not a bad person, just inconsistent.

Being consistent is very important to being liked. People like to be able to know how you will handle a request from them. You need to be consistent in what you do no matter your mood. Your personal mood should never affect the way you treat people.

  1. Leave a Good First Impression.

We have all read somewhere that people will judge you in the first few seconds they meet you. The rest of the conversation they will find ways to justify that initial reaction.

This all comes down to your body language and how you greet them. A firm hand shake and good eye contact is a perfect start. Stand up straight and smile. It sounds simple and is actually that easy. Once you have made that positive first impression you are already in a favored position.

Take note of your body language and how you present yourself all the time. You may not be talking to a whole room but there is always someone watching. You are always on stage. First impressions happen from across the room as well.

  1. Good Body Language.

As mentioned before you need to take note of yourself and what you are presenting. Focus on your gestures and expressions.

Maintaining eye contact, uncrossing your arms and leaning in towards the person speaking are all good signs that you are listening and interested. Good body language will always attract people to you. Having a positive body language you can set the tone of the conversation.

My body language is something I always work on to improve. My one college once mentioned to me how I was able to turn a negative conversation around into something positive.

I was working in a service delivery company at the time. A disgruntled customer came up to me with a list of complaints. I kept my attitude and body language positive towards the customer. I listened to him rant on and on without changing my position. I smiled while I listened and did not say a word.

As he kept on and on he started speaking in a more relaxed tone. Just with my body language and listening he had calmed down. When he was done with his rant. I asked some questions to clarify his complaint. After that I sorted it out for him and he left smiling. A couple of days later he was back making use of our services again.

Simple things like this can make a big difference in your results.

  1. They Smile.

Imagine two people standing in front of you. One with a frown and angry expression, and the other person smiling. Which one will you choose to start a conversation with? The person smiling of course.

People tend to return your expression when you talk or meet them. When you greet people with a smile they will smile back at you. When you smile at people during a conversation they will return the favor. I am not talking about people using the subway, we all know people avoid eye contact and smiling while on the train.

This will take some practice. I started by smiling at myself in the morning and kept smiling at every chance I had. It felt a bit silly in the beginning but my overall mood did improve.

Over some time my relationships with many people improved as well. People were friendlier towards me and I met a lot of new people. People just seemed more responsive towards me.

At networking events I started making better quality connections. I could not believe that this one change was making such a positive impact on my life. Try it, it does work.

  1. They know when to Share.

Opening up to someone too soon will get you labeled as a complainer. Something you should try to avoid at all costs. Let the other person guide the conversation to when to share.

  1. They Remember Names.

Your name is an important part of what and who you are. Think of people naming streets and buildings after them. People donate tons of money so they can get their name on the entrance of a building. People take pride in their names.

So why would you think it is not important to remember someone’s name? Greeting someone by their name will leave a lasting impression with the person. You will make them feel important. And we all like to feel important. This is a great first impression.

Some people will say they are poor at remembering names. Well, you need to find a way to change that. The way I changed it is to repeat the person’s name during the conversation. By repeating it a couple of times it was easier for me to remember it.

Work on this and notice the expression on the persons face when you greet them by name after only meeting once before. This will be proof enough that this is important to people.

Follow these basic habits will get you more liked and respected in all areas of your life. People will be drawn to you and you will be remembered.

Have fun out there!


Mention one thing that attracts you to  someone.